“We’re Not Getting a Divorce!”




Have you ever heard an excited, little kid yell,

“We’re not getting a divorce! We’re not getting a divorce!”

That isn’t something most of us get to hear. More than likely, what you have heard is a sad child mumble,

“Mom and Dad are getting a divorce.”

I have ministered to couples on the brink of divorce. I want you to know I never give up on these couples. Until the final divorce decree is signed, sealed, and delivered, there is hope. Many times, even after a divorce has taken place, a couple will reconcile.

While helping couples save their marriages isn’t in most children’s ministers’ job descriptions, it is something each of you needs to be aware is a possibility.

The point I want to make is don’t ever give up on praying and hoping for better outcomes for divorcing couples. And by better outcomes, I mean marriage reconciliation. It is possible even in the most extreme cases.

The following is a wonderful story that proves this point. Naomi Ford Bolt was a DivorceCare consultant for Church Initiative’s DivorceCare program before she passed away. She also ran DivorceCare at her church. She shared the following story with me and gladly gave me permission to share it with all of you.

Several years ago, I had a gentleman come to our DivorceCare group whose wife had just left him and taken their two little girls. He was totally devastated. He was a new Christian, but his wife had not come to know the Lord yet. Now he was doubting God and wondering why God had not stopped his wife from leaving.

A couple of weeks into the session, he started bringing his two little girls, five and seven years old, to the DivorceCare for Kids group. They loved it and never missed a session.

At his request, the group started praying for his wife’s salvation and for the reconciliation of their marriage. We prayed earnestly every week. For the reconciliation session, he did not show up for the group. We were so disappointed because we felt this was the one session he needed most.

The following week, he came back, and before he even told us what had happened, the children went running into their DC4K group, excitedly saying, “Miss Dawn! Miss Dawn! We’re not getting a divorce!”He explained that after our forgiveness session, he had made a list of all the things he needed his wife to forgive him for. He read the list to her, and she did forgive him, and they were able to reconcile their marriage.The following Sunday, his wife was in church without him. My heart sank! (I found out later that he had to work.) When the pastor gave the invitation, she went forward. The pastor motioned for me to come up. I took her to our prayer room, where she prayed to receive Christ.

Many years and two more children later, they are a very happy couple who allow God to be head of their home. God’s miracles are such a beautiful thing to watch.

To hear excited children exclaim their parents are not getting a divorce brings such joy to all involved, including you as the children’s minister and the many volunteers in your church. It is a celebration. It is encouraging. It is a joy-filled moment in the Lord.

I pray every one of you gets to experience such a joyous occasion at least once in your ministry to children.

This article is updated and adapted from an article originally published on the Kids & Divorce blog on August 20, 2014.


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2 thoughts on ““We’re Not Getting a Divorce!”

  1. When we had one family go back together… it was such a blessing… The kids had hope…We never saw a bunch of kids pray so hard for one family….even knowing their family wasn’t going to go back together! And we saw the little girl share her love… the parents told Tom and I they never would have gone for help… had they not put their daughter in DC4K! It was a blessing!!!! DC4K works!
    Update on this family: We saw them at s local fair last week! They are still together and still going strong…their words to us!

    • Tammy and Tom, thank you so much for this uplifting comment. What a blessing for that family, for you as DC4K leaders and for all of us reading this post.

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