Archive for August, 2015
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A Disney-like approach to ministering to children of divorce
Research shows that for many children the treatment they receive at church after the divorce of their parent’s hurts almost as much as the divorce itself. Many children feel the loss of a church deeply and for years to come. What if church leaders developed a Disney like approach when ministering to these kids? I’ve visited various Disney parks many times. They know Read more…
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Why do some kids seem to breeze through a divorce?
Many children of divorce appear to breeze through the divorce at the time the divorce happens. But don’t jump to conclusions. Many of these little girls will try to “keep the peace.” They will hide their feelings and say and do the things they think the adults expect and want from them. However, the divorce experience remains alive – but as memories that they push Read more…
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Kids are blunt when they talk about why parents shouldn’t get divorced
I have worked with children of divorce for over forty years. I’ve heard some conversations that would curl your hair. I’ve also heard stories of tenderness and tales of heartbreak. Several times I have asked children of divorce, “If you had a chance to tell your parents, and other adults something about divorce, what would you say?” Some kids are blunt and say, “Don’t Read more…
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Single parents share their 10 loneliest moments
Many single parents will tell you loneliness is one of the biggest frustrations of parenting alone. 10 loneliest moments When my grandmother died and I didn’t have anyone to console me in my grief It was a New Year’s Eve party. My house was full of people and everyone had someone and I didn’t When I walked into the house after my husband Read more…
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When kids of divorce play the “but” card
“But Dad wouldn’t do it that way.” “But mom lets us have ice cream before bed.” “But dad said if we didn’t want to go to bed early we don’t have to. He said so.” “But mom said we have to do our homework as soon as we get home. She said if it’s a problem for you to call her.” Children who Read more…
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How grandparents can help their grandchildren when mommy and daddy get a divorce
Grandparents can have a profound impact on the lives of grandchildren living through the divorce of their parents. First thing grandparents need to realize is many of these grandchildren are experiencing a trauma in their lives. Divorce is traumatic and many of these children need someone outside the home to help them process all that is happening in their lives. Without help, these Read more…
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How to retain (or attract) divorcing families to your church– and why it’s important
Often, when a couple divorces, both spouses leave their church. If there are children, they disappear as well. I want to show you ways to retain at least one of the spouses (and hopefully their children)– and why you should try. Occasionally, one of the spouses will remain at the church. In rare instances, both will stay, but for the most part, the Read more…
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Question of the week: Will your jaw drop when you see how many single parent homes there are in your area?
The data is in, and the news for kids is not good. There has been another jump in the percentage of children living in single parent homes. In the United States, 35% of all children now live in single parent homes. Stunningly, that number is even higher in some states– over 40% in seven states reaching a high of 48% in Mississippi. Utah has Read more…