What happens when you have the “warm fuzzies” for challenging children



Take a moment to think of someone you care about or someone that has impacted your life in a positive way. There are a lot of people that have impacted my life especially in ministry. When I think of one lady in particular and how she has blessed me down through the years I get the “warm fuzzies”.

You know that feeling where you just feel better inside, under your skin and in your heart. You feel all warm inside and right with the world even if it’s only for a moment.

My friend has been with me through thick and thin; through divorce and death; through the good and bad. She’s in her eighties now and still relevant and intentional in ministry. She lives on the West coast and I live on the East coast but she is always with me in my heart.

Brain research shows that when we feel gratitude or thankfulness there are chemical changes in our brains. Thoughts physically alter the brain wiring.

Many times children can sense the emotional state that you are in. What might happen if when a child comes into your group if you silently looked at the child and thanked God for allowing this child to be in your group? Or you looked at this child with gratitude for what he or she might teach you today about being a kid?

I’ll tell you what will happen.

  • You will be creating chemical changes in your brain
  • You’ll feel better about the child
  • You’ll feel better about yourself
  • You’ll feel better about your ability to minister to this child
  • You will impact the child also because he or she will sense the difference in your attitude toward him.
  • There will be chemical changes going on the child’s brain as well as in the child’s heart
  • You might very well create the “warm fuzzies” in that child

In order to create this emotional well being in yourself one has to access the power of being intentional. In others words you have to purposefully think and be intentional about changing your mindset toward a child. You have to intentionally think the best and be grateful toward the child.

How a school changed children’s behaviors

In an article titled, “The Secret to fixing School Discipline Problems? Change the Behavior of the Adults” they talk about the success a school in San Diego has had with children and their behaviors. The adults have become intentional in their approach to discipline.

In other words if you want to fix discipline problems the adults have to change first. They use every situation as a teachable moment. They have learned that punishment doesn’t change kid’s behavior.

Kids have to be taught how to change their behavior. That means adults have to use the power of being intentional in their interactions with the children. It means thinking differently toward the child and thinking positively.

This however, is not a new concept. In many of the books in the New Testament the disciples were intentional in their salutations at the end of their letters.

When you read the ending of many books in the New Testament you’ll read,

The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit Philippians 4:23

The Lord be with your spirit. Grace be with you. 2 Timothy 4:22

Peace to the brothers, and love with faith from God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ Ephesians 6:23

I’ll end this by sending all of you warm greetings. May the grace of our Father be with each of you as you harness the power of being intentional with each child.


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  1. Pingback: DC4K » 5 Ways to assist a child with a broken and hurting heart

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