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Question of the week: Why do you have so much compassion for troubled and disruptive kids?
I It is really very simple—children do to others what has been done to them. Or they are hurting, little children, and their behavior is their voice screaming for help. In DC4K, or DivorceCare for Kids, we see children calming down and bringing their behavior under control when They learn they have a voice. They put a name to their feelings. Someone Read more…
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Need more helpers in children’s ministry?
Finding volunteers to work in children’s ministry can be daunting, to say the least. I remember years ago when I was a children’s ministry director, finding helpers was the hardest part of my job. I would imagine it is ever harder in our fast-paced world today. When you have children of divorce in your ministries who might be out of control or have Read more…
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Question of the week: How long does it take a child to recover from the divorce of their parents?
The answer to this question can get complicated. Many divorcing parents think their children will get over the divorce fairly quickly. But what parents need to realize is while the adult life might go on and they will find a new partner, the children will never find another parent. The two parents will always be their parents. Most research shows that for adults Read more…
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Sleep deprivation can cause behavior problems in kids of divorce
Few people realize that many children of divorce are not getting enough sleep. When you think about it, it does make sense. Children naturally do better in an environment that feels safe, has a schedule along with consistent routines. Dad or mom moves out of the home and nothing is consistent any longer. Many children no longer feel safe and so sleep Read more…
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Overwhelmed & Frazzled Single Parents
Ministering to the children means knowing something about their single parent and understanding the family situation. Situations are not always what they appear to be. A couple of years ago a leader of a DivorceCare group contacted me. She had a lady from another church in her group and she had received a call from this participant’s pastor. While the pastor was appreciative Read more…
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Helpful tip #2 for starting the school year: Why rituals are important for the child of divorce
When parents divorce, children are more likely to lose their connections with those around them. Many of us in know that children are born to connect. We have observed and watched as children become disconnected. Many problems facing young people today are due in large part to our failure to meet the children’s most basic human need for connectedness. Divorce brings many changes Read more…
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Children of Divorce Deserve Better Treatment in Our Churches
How does a church, which focuses on traditional family ministry, minister to the child of divorce? This seems to be the question many churches are wrestling with as they try to define exactly what family ministry looks like. Divorcing families have indeed changed the landscape of what families look like within the church. Several years ago Amy Ziettlow and Elizabeth Marquardt, with the Read more…
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The lost generation? Saving today’s kids from the long-term effects of divorce
It is important for anyone living with or working with the child of divorce to understand the long-term legacies of divorce on children. As a single parent, grandparent, mentor or church leader, you can help an individual child to better cope and potentially even lessen the impact of a particular long-term legacy. Your input today may help lessen the severity of the Read more…
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Planting shadows: generational consequences of divorce
Chinese proverb One generation plants the trees; another gets the shade. American proverb One generation gets a divorce; another gets to live in the shadows of confusion, loss of a marriage model, loss of trust in relationships, haphazard church involvement and the experience of living in fractured families.
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Confusion, stress and other short-term legacies of divorce on kids
Several years ago I had a single mom show up at my house late one evening. She had left the husband that day, taken the kids and a few belongings and had checked into a local hotel. The precious 4th grade little girl looked bewildered. When I asked her what she thought about what was happening she said, “I am sooo confused. Somebody Read more…
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What does divorce do to a child?
Accept the challenge! Read articles on ministering to the child of divorce at blog.dc4k.org Get free email ministry tips. Subscribe to the DC4K blog here
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Talking to Kids about the Tornado in OK
I grew up in Bartlesville, OK. I have heard about tornadoes my entire life. I owned two child care programs in OK for over twenty-five years. As a kid I remember going into the hallways at school and putting my hands over my head while crouched down on my knees. In childcare we practiced relentlessly with the children. The fire department recommended which Read more…
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