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Give it all to Jesus: My personal story of surviving the holidays
I’ve been through some painful Christmases, following a divorce and after the death of my husband. Down through the years, I developed a way to survive the Christmas season. I’ve shared this story with hundreds of people and I’ve shared it on this blog in Christmases past. Hurting single parents have told me that this one story has helped them also discover a Read more…
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Reasons Why Children Get Angry During the Holidays
Some single parents face the holidays with excitement and a resolve to make this holiday season the best ever for their children. However, if this is the first year a single parent in your church has faced the holidays, he or she may be approaching the holidays with trepidation. These single parents might not be sure how their children are going to react Read more…
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The Wind Chime That Changed Christmas
For this single-parent family, it was the first Christmas without the other parent. How could a wind chime make a difference? How did a wind chime help this single parent make new traditions during the holidays? It’s important for single parents to approach the birth of our Savior during the Christmas holidays. It doesn’t have to be all about presents, stressing over where Read more…
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What are the 3 S’s that can trigger unexpected emotions and memories at Christmas?
Just thinking about walking into my mom’s kitchen brings back fond memories. The aroma of homemade candies and pies flood my mind. The sight of her Christmas tree with the tiny little red bell that had been in my family since before I was born comes to my mind. Any time I smell cinnamon, it takes me back to Christmases past of Read more…
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Question of the week: Why is the interruption of routines and traditions at Christmas so difficult for a child?
Children of divorce get used to a particular routine. While living in a different house every week or leaving your home to spend every other weekend with a different parent might not seem like a routine to us adults, to children, it is what has become their routine. It is a schedule that has become a routine they can count on to Read more…
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Little people need a big people advocate in the new year
As we are approaching a new year I want to challenge all of you to represent the little people at the big people’s table. What do I mean by that? I mean that many “little people” of divorce are going to be terribly stressed out as we approach the new year. They are going to need a big people advocate. Holidays such as Thanksgiving and Christmas are not Read more…
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Part One: Reasons we do what we do at Christmas and all year long
The little fellow stood off to the side of the room. Everyone was jumping up and down waiting for their special Christmas treat. As each child received their present one could hear laughter and squeals of delight. All this little boy wanted was for his mom to come home for Christmas. If she could just change her mind and come home even if Read more…
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What are the 3 S’s that can trigger unexpected emotions and memories at Christmas?
Just thinking about walking into my mom’s kitchen brings back fond memories. The aroma of homemade candies and pies flood my mind. The sight of her Christmas tree with the tiny little red bell that had been in my family since before I was born comes to my mind. Any time I smell cinnamon, it takes me back to Christmases past of Read more…
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Be an encourager for the little people this holiday season
When I was growing up, we went to my grandmother’s for holiday events. I remember when our entire family, including all the cousins, came together at Christmas, there were always two eating areas. One was in the kitchen at the kitchen table, and that’s where all the kids or, as my grandfather would say, “the little people” would eat. At the nice dining-room Read more…
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Reasons why ministering to hurting children is the richest job on the planet
For those of us who work with hurting children, another year has come and passed, and hopefully, we have made a difference. Those of us who have the honor of ministering to hurting children have richest job on the planet. We get the pleasure of ministering to innocent children who have an innate desire to love the Lord. “I love Jesus with Read more…
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All I want for Christmas is my ………..
I imagine when you saw this article title, many of you thought the rest of this phrase would be “my two front teeth.” You may remember that fun Christmas song “All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth” from childhood. The lyrics talk about how people stop and stare at a little child missing his two front teeth. The child wishes Read more…
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Question of the week: Should divorced parents be encouraged to spend Thanksgiving together?
A lot of people encourage divorcing parents to come together for holidays, such as Thanksgiving. People think it is in the best interest of the children. The premise is to create the image of one big, happy family. Although that might seem to work for the adults, for the most part, it is not a good idea where children are concerned. Psychologist Carl Read more…
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When kids of divorce explode emotionally, how do you help the parent?
In ministering to children of divorce and single parents, it is important to realize that single parents might need to quickly change how they discipline. They’ve moved from a two-parent partnership to a one-parent home. What worked before might no longer work for the single parent. It can be scary to parent alone, especially when children exhibit behaviors not normal for them. This Read more…
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ATT: Children’s and family ministers– stop ministering! Seriously.
My daughter on duty in Afghanistan. Right about now I figure most of you are pretty stressed. From fall festivals through Christmas celebrations life can get pretty hectic for those in church ministries. You have the heart to minister. All year long the Lord has given you opportunities to further His kingdom through ministries to children and families. Now it is time Read more…
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Kids & Divorce Christmas Greetings: Compilation of Christmas Articles
We’ve posted quite a few articles the past few years to help you help the children of divorce and the single parents in your church. Following is a summation of some those articles. I pray you are able to use these to minister to the hurting in your church and that they open the eyes to many ministers and volunteers who work with Read more…
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Should a divorced single parent spend the holidays with the ex?
As a children’s minister, have you ever encountered a single parent who asks you about spending the holidays with his ex? The children might be pushing the adults to do this. The single parent wants to please the kids but is seeking your input. How will you respond? In this article, you will discover some points to think about before answering the single Read more…
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How do I help the child of divorce who is all about “gimme, gimme, gimme” at Christmas?
We’ve talked a lot on this site about the hurting child of divorce and the various ways of ministering to these children. If you have been ministering very long to the child of divorce you know that while they indeed are hurting deeply, some of these children have figured out how to play the two parents against each other to get what they Read more…
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How you can encourage single parents to attend church during the holidays?
A young single mom entered my class one Sunday close to Christmas. She was almost trembling and I could tell she was very upset. She just stood there looking at me and when I asked, “What’s wrong?” She said, “I need a hug.” Single parenting is tough almost all the time. But Sundays seem particularly hard for single parents. It could be that Read more…
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When military parents divorce — how are the children affected?
Have you ever given any thought to military families? How about the kids in the divorced military family? I can hear many of you saying, We don’t have a military base close to us. Or I think the base near us handles those issues. No military base in your area? While you might not have a military base close to your church, you Read more…
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The funny side of single parenting during Christmas holidays
Did you know there is a joyful and funny side to single parenting at Christmas? Sometimes church leaders and children’s ministers can get so wrapped up in the hurting that we forget to look at the lighter, happier side of life that people parenting alone might experience. Naomi,* close friend of mine, told me this story several years ago and every Christmas I Read more…
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Christmas, Single Parents, and Immanuel
Our guest blogger today is Matt Havilland. This was originally published on December 15, 2015 at www.1corinthians13parenting.com Christmas. Many of us think of it as a time of celebration of our Lord’s birth; a time of joy, creating and reliving childhood memories; music, family, food, and holiday cheer. This is the one season that seems almost magical- the “most wonderful time of the year”. For Read more…
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Christmas and the emotions of a child of divorce
It’s obvious. Christmas is a hard time of year for children of divorce. Traditions are disrupted. Visitation disrupts their schedules. What should you expect as you interact with one of these children in the context of your ministry? Divorce or separation of parents is recent If it is a child’s first Christmas after the separation or divorce of their parents, you should be Read more…
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5 Ways You Can Help Single Parents Survive the Upcoming Holidays
From Halloween through Christmas can seem like an entire season for single parents. For people parenting alone or co-parenting these two months have a tendency to loom very large over them. Stress is high – finances are low. Parties are often – a full night of sleep is desired. Shopping and rushing around is endured – calm quiet activities are rare. What can Read more…
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Changing family structures: how they affect your church’s Christmas celebrations
♫♫ “Christmas is coming, the goose is getting fat Please put a penny in the old man’s hat If you haven’t got a penny, a ha’penny will do, If you haven’t got a ha’penny then God bless you” ♫♫ This was once a popular Christmas song. It was comprised in the nineteenth century by an unknown author. It was a song that used Read more…
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Why divorcing parents shouldn’t spend the holidays together
Many times children’s pastors and other church leaders will be asked about the idea of divorcing parents spending the holidays together. Perhaps you are one of those pastors and you aren’t quite sure how to advise the divorcing parents. You may be like a lot of people and encourage divorcing parents to come together for a holiday like Thanksgiving. You might think Read more…
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Question of the week: Where can I find resources to help the single parents in my church during Christmas break?
Many times those of us that work in ministry hurt for the hurting. We want to help but just aren’t sure how to help. What can you say to make the situation better for a divorcing family? Sometimes it is best not to say anything but just give them a big hug. Sometimes they need someone to listen to them. Sometimes they just Read more…
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